Ouran High School Glee Club
by theknittingotaku
Summary: What if the host club was a show choir?
1. Chapter 1

Note: I don't own the titles to Glee or Ouran High School Host Club. All original work to both shows belong to their creators. And now, to begin the fanfiction...

It was the first Glee Club meeting of the week. Tamaki was busy attempting to figure out the commoners' pitch-pipe. Hunny was eating cake, while Mori was faithfully by his side. Kyoya was crunching numbers and simultaneously obtaining blackmail, as only he could. Hikaru and Kaoru were working on their latest duet. All the while, they had no idea what was about to happen.

Haruhi, a small first-year, came in because she was looking for a place to study. Apparently, she thought that the music room had been abandoned. She thought wrong. The rug was ever-so-slightly pushed up at the end, and caused her to trip and fall into their new microphone!

"You do realize that was our brand-new, _high-tech_ microphone," Hikaru said.

"It cost over ten thousand yen," Kaoru added.

"Well, Tamaki, what should we do about this?" Kyoya asked.

"Haruhi Fujioka should have to _sing _off his debt!" Tamaki said with a grin. "Does that sound acceptable to everyone?"

"Yes, milord!" the twins agreed.

"But-" Haruhi protested.

"It appears to be adequate that he should have to sing," Kyoya said agreeably.

"But I can't-" objected Haruhi.

"YAY! Haru-chan's gonna sing!" Hunny exclaimed.

"I can't si- Who are you calling Haru-chan?" Haruhi yelled.

"Then it's decided," Tamaki said.

"I am not able to sing," Haruhi explained, finally able to get a word in. Everyone was quiet, with looks of shock on their faces, except for Kyoya, always the cool one. "I've never had any musical talent whatsoever. I've been banned even from singing 'Happy Birthday' at my friends' parties."

"Can you dance?" asked Tamaki.

"No."

"Can you play an instrument?"

"Nope."

"Do you have any experience working backstage?"

"I do not."

"Then we must _teach_ you to sing," he suggested with a grin.

"Excuse me?" Haruhi answered, confused. "I told you. I am not able to sing."

"We will fix it. Ahem. Cue the music," Tamaki said, clearing his throat. Then he began to sing the song "Popular" from Wicked, which was oddly appropriate. He danced around the room, barking out orders to the rest of the glee club. Kyoya was ringing up the school tailor, Hikaru and Kaoru gave Haruhi a haircut, Mori gave Haruhi his spare contacts, and Hunny ate cake.

Haruhi changed into the uniform they gave her. Unwittingly, Tamaki walked in on her.

"Y-you're a girl?"


	2. Chapter 2

Note: I don't own any of the titles of Ouran High School Host Club or Glee. All titles and characters are original creations of Bisco Hatori and the creators of Glee.

Here's what you missed from the last installment of Ouran High School Glee Club: Haruhi tripped over a rug and broke the glee club's new microphone. She is now endebted to the glee club, and has to sing off her debt. Tamaki gave her a makeover, but mistook her for a boy. He walked in on her while she was changing into her new uniform, and found out she was a girl. And that's what you missed on Ouran High School Glee Club!

"Never claimed otherwise," said Haruhi.

"But- but-" Tamaki stammered, walking over to the emo corner.

"I knew from the moment I met her," Hunny said thoughtfully.

"I figured it would be easier, considering you already bought me the uniform," Haruhi explained.

"Which, by the way, will be added onto your debt," Kyoya added.

Haruhi groaned, fearing her debt would never be paid off. "So, I don't want another new uniform to be added to my debt. I will never be able to pay it off if it is, so I can just conceal my gender."

"Although this might be difficult in specific situations, I do believe we can manage that," Kyoya said, attempting to hide his disappointment at her unwillingness to increase her debt. "I suppose we should begin teaching you how to sing, shouldn't we?"

"Yeah, good luck with that. I sing like a cat that swallowed the tinsel off of a Christmas tree," she said.

"Maybe we can fix it," suggested Hunny hopefully.

"Well, first off, we should find out what vocal part you are," Kyoya said. "Tamaki, cue the piano."

Haruhi began singing basic vocal warm ups, and the rest of the glee club found out that she was right, that she did in fact sing like a cat that swallowed the tinsel off of a Christmas tree.

"How about we put you in the monotone section," Hikaru suggested.

"But, Hika-chan, that's not an actual section," Hunny pointed out. Hikaru face-palmed himself and Haruhi rolled her eyes.

"Perhaps she's an alto?" Kyoya suggested.

"I don't know. She hit some pretty high notes," Kaoru said.

"Not that they sounded good," added Hikaru.

"Maybe she's a mezzo soprano?" Hunny inquired. "They're right in the middle, aren't they?"

"We could just put her wherever she fits with our songs," Tamaki said, finally coming out of the emo corner. "That would probably be the easiest thing to do."

"Sounds fine. Let's get to work on our song, shall we?" Kyoya said, handing Haruhi some sheet music. "The song that we are doing is called 'Lollipop.' You've probably heard of it."

"It's basically about why some guy calls his girlfriend, 'Lollipop,'" Hikaru said.

"It's not very deep, but it sure is fun!" Kaoru added.

"We'll put you on the melody, so that it'll be easy for you, Haru-chan!" Hunny said.

"Yeah," Mori agreed.

And so, they attempted to teach Haruhi the melody, which was incredibly easy. However, she still showed no capability of carrying a tune.

"This is hopeless!" Hikaru exclaimed after the fifteenth try.

"She's hopeless!" Kaoru corrected. "She can't even learn the first four measures!"

Tamaki looked like he was ready to bang his head against the wall. "We can't teach her to sing. We should just give up."

"Excuse me? You want to give up? We are not giving up. This girl has a debt to pay, remember?" Kyoya pointed out.

"But Kyo-chan, how can we teach her to sing?" Hunny inquired.

"I'll just say desperate times call for desperate measures," Kyoya explained, although it really wasn't much of an explanation.

"Go on..." the twins said with growing curiosity.

"Anya," Kyoya answered.


	3. Chapter 3

Note: I don't own any of the titles to Ouran High School Host Club or Glee. All the titles and characters belong to their original creators.

Here's what you missed on the last episode of Ouran High School Glee Club: Haruhi tripped over a microphone and has to sing off her debt. Tamaki mistook her for a boy and now she has to conceal her gender. Haruhi can't sing, so everyone's having a hard time teaching her the music. And that's what you missed on Ouran High School Glee Club!

"And how do you expect Anya to do something for you?" Hikaru asked.

"Yeah. She hates you!" Kaoru added.

"She doesn't hate me. She just has such a strong passion for me that it can only be expressed through foreign curse words," Kyoya corrected.

"She hates him," Hikaru whispered to Haruhi.

"I'm going to go get her. She _will_ help Haruhi," Kyoya sighed, walking out of the room.

"You see, Haruhi, Anya doesn't really like Kyoya, and she's part of the other show choir, and they don't like us. They think that we're too preppy. But Anya is a really good singer. And she can dance, too. If she can't help you, nobody can," Tamaki explained.

"Why do I have to learn how to sing? I could work off my debt some other way. I could run errands or something," Haruhi said.

"We're a show choir!" Kaoru said.

"We don't have errands," Hikaru added.

Kyoya appeared in the door, still talking to Anya. You could tell she wasn't happy.

"That's Anya?" Haruhi asked.

"Yeah. She may be small, but her voice is really big," Hunny said.

"Okay, you're Haruhi, right?" Anya said, walking into the room as quickly as she could, mostly to get away from Kyoya. Haruhi nodded. "Come over here to the piano. You are going to learn this." Anya picked up the sheet music and looked at it, appalled. "Y'all are singing 'Lollipop'? Seriously? That song is so dumb."

"It's fun, Annie!" Hunny protested.

"It may be fun, but don't y'all want more of a challenge?" Anya said.

"Well, what songs are your choir doing?" Kaoru asked pointedly.

"We're doing Adam Lambert's 'If I Had You'," Anya answered smugly.

"That doesn't sound hard at all," Hikaru said.

"But it is. We're doing it in four-part harmony, with dancing. Y'all probably don't know how hard that is, especially if you're wearing a dress. And heels," Anya replied.

"So, you think we should dress up like girls?" Tamaki asked.

"No! That's not it at all! I just don't think that y'all realise that girls put in a lot more effort-"

"Perhaps you should be teaching Haruhi, Anya," Kyoya suggested, cutting Anya off.

She glared at him. "Okay. Haruhi, here's your pitch. Let me hear you sing."

Anya never knew what hit her.


	4. Chapter 4

Note: I don't own any of the titles to Ouran High School Host Club or Glee. All titles and characters belong to their creators.

Here's what you missed on the last episode of Ouran High School Glee Club: Kyoya brought in Anya in so Haruhi can learn how to sing. Anya argued with the choir members about song choice. She asked Haruhi to sing for her. And that's what you missed on Ouran High School Glee Club!

"So, that's your real singing voice?" Anya asked, trying to be diplomatic.

"Yes," Haruhi answered her. Anya said something in English. It was either an insult or a curse word. "Is it really that bad?" she asked the other show choir members.

Everyone looked around at each other, not wanting to have to tell her that it was really that bad.

Kyoya was the only one cold enough to say, "Yes, Haruhi. Your singing is terrible, and you have to learn to sing-"

"In order to pay off my debt. I know. You've told me enough times. I still don't understand why," Haruhi said.

"We're a show choir! We sing!" Tamaki said.

"Badly," Anya added. Hikaru smacked her on the shoulder.

"So… How am I supposed to learn how to sing?" Haruhi asked.

Everybody looked at Anya, who, like everyone else, seemed puzzled by this question.

"I'll come back tomorrow with a plan to tackle this situation. In the meantime, read this. It'll help," she said, handing Haruhi a copy of Music for Morons. "Sorry if the title's a bit demeaning, but you're a beginner, and it's the simplest way to learn music." Anya started toward the door, which was blocked by members of the other show choir, along with the director, Mr. Oda.

"What are they doing here?" Hunny asked.

"I don't know," Mori answered, giving his one line for the episode.

"Anya? Do you know? They're your choir, after all," Kyoya deferred, shrugging.

"That doesn't mean I know," Anya said.

"Anya!" Taa-chan, a member of the other show choir, said, running up to her. "We just got some really alarming news."

"What happened?" Anya asked her.

"Due to budget cuts," Mr. Oda started, taking over. "There is only enough money for one show choir."

"What? What does that mean?" Tamaki asked.

"It means we're going to have to merge," Mr. Oda answered.

"Merge?" the twins said, looking at each other.

"We're going to have to be one show choir."


	5. Chapter 5

"What?" Anya asked, clearly shocked by this abrupt occurrence.

"We're going to have to become one show choir," Mr. Oda said.

"I know! I heard you! Don't say it again!" she said, pacing the room frantically.

"Why couldn't they have just chosen which choir will stay?" Hikaru asked.

Taa-chan rolled her eyes. "You know they would have chosen your choir because they like you more, so it wouldn't have been fair!"

"Well, why couldn't we have had a competition for it? A sing-off?" Kaoru asked.

"Because there aren't any judges that could be fair and impartial," Kyoya said, being the only calm person in the room besides the teacher.

"We're still going to get to do the songs we want to do, though, right?" Anya asked. "Right? Please, somebody say right!"

"Possibly. However, there are more people, so there's always a chance you won't get the song you want," Mr. Oda told her calmly.

"I know, but I just hate that we might not get to do the songs we want to do because of budget cuts."

Tamaki pushed his way to the front of the room. "I know!" he said. "How about, as a peace offering, your choir will get to choose the first song!"

"Boss, does that mean we'll get to choose a song on our own, too?" Kaoru asked.

"No, we've asked enough of them already for them to join us," Tamaki answered him.

Hikaru said, "We didn't even ask them to join us!"

"Hika-chan, we know you have a really big mouth, but shut up, 'kay?" Hunny said, defying his normally sweet and adorable nature. Everybody stared at him. "What? It's true!" he said.

"So what happens now?" Kaoru asked.

"Maybe we can just get to know everybody and make amends," Tamaki suggested.

"That's a great idea," Mr. Oda said.


End file.
